saturday

there was a long moment in time, or maybe two, when i felt like i was unbreakable.
there was once joy for no reason, smiles for a kiss, smiles for a hug, and smiles for frowns even.
and nobody minded.

until it got up and left, unafraid to leave, to go to someone else,
not to make me jealous
not to make me empty
not even to confuse me

to see where i am now i smile,
laugh, ...

the kids were on the low wall, itching to climb down,
the stars were not yet out to play
but still they patiently waited,
he couldn't see their faces, but he knows,
he knew they were angry, hard,
harsh, hardened like calcium
over life's mysteries and the lies they were led to believe in,
that people are perfect, that somebody loves them,
that they could amount to something,
that it'd be easy, that they could make a difference,

in the cold the smoke looked bright over their mouths,
in the cold the bottles clanked like tiny cymbals,
only time to pass by and they needed a companion,
couldn't accept time to heal things,

and soon it was dark, clouded stars,
the lights he turned off one by one,
finally the lamp in his own room,
next to the bed and books,

he took one long breath, sipped in the sub-zero atmosphere,
cooling his lungs,
he lifted the covers and prayed to the only God he knew,
kissed his hands amen, took one last gaze
out over the world, saw the clouded stars and the peeping moon,
then turned over, back against the window,
hoping his hoping prayers would suffice.

they jumped down,
waited until their knuckles calloused,
until their feet began to move and chatter,
stepped onto his lawn,
sang a prayer in their hearts, burn and burn,
kissed their hands amen,
and set the tree on fire.

Bang! bang! the loud bang,
the crackling of the fire woke the man,
he knew there was smoke rising like a pleasing aroma
finding its way to their God.
but he didn't dare to turn back and look;
their laughter kept him awake.